Choices suck. They suck because I can’t blame anyone else if I make the wrong one. It’s my decision to make and I should appropriately weigh every option and how it will affect my future. Life would be so much simpler if someone else made these choices for me and I could happily say, “It wasn’t my choice.” There are no expectations from people who don’t have the ability to make their own choices. It’s nice not to have any expectations sometimes.
Every single day I’m presented with so many choices and at times I’m not sure what to do. The most common question I get is, “how do you split your time up between Blue Track, Plugged, and Karlani? How do you choose what to work on?”
And every single time my response is, “I don’t know.”
It seems like I’m unable to focus on one thing for more than 5-10 minutes. Every day I feel like I’m failing at all three things and I’m on the verge of a colossal break down.
Today I went to play basketball and all I could think about is why the hell can’t I find time to play the sport I love anymore? You think BTM, Plugged and Karlani is all I want to be working on? No, that foolish child in me still wants to become the best basketball player I can possibly become. Why? Because I know I can keep improving my skills even if I’m not trying to go professional. But how the hell am I going to find time for that? What choices am I going to make? Do I want to be the best basketball player or the best entrepreneur or the best investor?
I want to be all and then some.
I don’t need people to sit here and tell me the software they use to manage their time effectively and focus on their tasks. Screw your software. Tell me which software is going to keep me from making the wrong choices in my life so I can focus on what really matters. But that’s the thing, everything really matters so how can it or I really choose?
Family and friends matter.
This is called venting. Venting is when you start your story off talking about choices, segway to basketball and then try to reassure yourself that you’re just venting and tomorrow you’ll be back on the saddle until this overload happens again in a few days and then you’ll fall off the horse again. Rinse and repeat.
This journey I’m on is more mental than physical. You won’t see any articles from me that talk about why Facebook, Google or Apple are relevant. There are plenty of exceptional journalists, bloggers and opinion makers that cover these companies very well. I will probably say nothing that you haven’t already heard from someone else about these current trends. But what you will get from me is honest, personal and live commentary about my foolish quest to conquer the world and make it a better place. The only thing I’m an expert in is what goes on in my head and how I deal with it.
Why did I even name this post “Choices?”
I don’t know. Choices suck.